Ode to Mr. H.B.

For those of you that know me personally (besides as marthawannab) you know that Mr. H.B. officially retired this weeks from the Air Force.  After 20 years as a military man, I seriously don't know how he will be a civilian.  You know how these military men are....they have a pattern to say the least.  He is boasting of being a free man.....no more short hair cuts (yea right....he freaks out when his hair touches his ears) and being able to grow a goatee, much to Nonna's chagrin.  I guess those things remain to be seen. 

So, as Mr. H.B. turns the page in his life from one chapter to another, I have been reflecting on how he actually earned his nickname of Mr. H.B. and how he is really not a horse's butt at all.  He sure takes a lot of hits from me in that regard and doesn't seem to mind at all that I put all our business out there for the whole world to see.  Therefore, I have compiled a list of the reasons that I love him and of how his nickname is a misnomer....

1.  Depsite the fact that he was less than tickled when I approached him about having kids 14 years ago, he has become the most perfect dad.  While his diaper changing skills left a lot to be desired and he still says "Great Idea" to me when the kids are being hellions, he loves the little buggers and takes superb care of them.  Drama Queen's clothes may not match when he is responsible for getting her ready for school but at least she has clothes on. 

2.  I complain a lot about the way he does laundry but make no mistake about it, clean laundry is clean laundry.  It may be pink when it is supposed to be white and my brown cashmere sweater can now be put on Drama Queen's dolls but it is clean all the same.  It's not put up most of the time but it is clean.  And he is the black sock fairy...he puts my black socks together for work and that rates pretty high on my fabulous meter.

3. He tells me how pretty and skinny I am constantly.  Nuff said.

4.  He loves his family.  The keepers of the farm and Lil Mama are his heart and there is nothing wrong with a boy loving his family.  I have no doubt that when Lil Mama's baby gets here, he will love her to pieces and I am sure that she will love him too.

5.  We haven't had to call a plumber or repair man for the entire span of our marraige (that I can remember).  He is Mr. Fix-it in addition to being Mr. H.B.  And he doesn't just make do either, he does it right!  We have had many conversations about him doing to too right, if that makes any sense to ya'll.  He saves me lots of money in the fixing it arena and I am all about saving a dollar....also rates high up there on my fabulous meter.

6.  Everyone loves him.  Really they do.  I have been trying to can whatever it is that he has so I can make money off of it but he won't let me in on how he does it.  Darn him.....

7.  I tell him all the time that I am going to slit his throat and bury him in pieces in the backyard and he never takes is personally.  In fact, he laughs.  My disclaimer is that I AM KIDDING people!  I love him to death. 

8.  He puts up with me......I flit around from one project to the other and don't finish some of them.  I leave my mess all around half the time.  I am NOT organized.  I talk a lot.  Death marches are fun for me and he goes with me, even though they are not his cup of tea.  I recognize my faults and understand that he loves me in spite of them. 

9.  He has had the courage to stay in the military for so long.  Make no mistake about it....leaving your family for months at a time to do a job in 120 degree heat when people are trying to kill you takes a strain on a fellow.  He always managed to keep his head held high and return home to us.  Wherever he went, he always made sure we knew he was thinking about us.

10.  He loves me.  We have never had a fight in which one of us left and I don't recall many occassions where one of us slept on the couch because we were angry.  We bicker and he makes me mad as all get out, but at the end of the day he is my horse's butt and I certainly couldn't ever love a horse's butt more.

I am busting at the seams proud of the job that he has done over the past 20 years.  The military is losing a good man this week.  I can't wait to see what the next 20 years will bring.